Top Ten Irresistible Types of Women

We’ve all fallen for them at some point in our manly lives. The “one that got away” some of them. But it’s always nice to sort them into more general stereotypes to reminisce on a shallower level so that we might connect with online strangers a bit better.

The Good-at-Guy-Stuff Gal

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Summertime. Picnic. You’re throwing around a football with your boys. Suddenly. Cute girl with short shorts and tank top comes out of her white Jeep with her sunglass-eyed girlfriends laughing and havin’ a row. You’re about to throw the ball when cute girl calls for ball. You throw, she’s catches. Nice catch. Let’s see if she can throw ba- She already throws. Perfect spiral. You fumble the catch a bit but hold on. She giggles and makes you fumble your heart.

The Nerd

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She’s the introspective, intellectual overachiever. The fact that she’s so clever and smart keeps you at a distance but when you learn that she’s a person with feelings just like everybody else, you start to realize her more human qualities: compassion, humor, and beauty. And now her being smart is a plus!

The Foreigner

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The way she talks. The way she moves. The way she laughs. Everything about her is so different. She opens your mind to different styles, customs, cultures. Her fresh and new perspectives is what marvels you and you can’t help but want to learn more.

The Childhood Friend Turned Adult Hottie

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Mom: Hey, Susan is here. Come show her your new video game.
You at age 12: Ugh ok.

Mom: Hey, your old friend Susan is here.
You at age 25: Oh. OH OKAYYY~

Probably the reason why Susan is so irresistible now is because you think that when you younger she was so accessible. But now that she’s hot, you probably missed that boat but long for it anyways.

The Bombshell Conservative Girl

Prayer Woman

Bang! Boobs.
Boom! Booty.
La-zam! Legs.
…all hidden under layers and layers of cotton, wool, Christian music, and abstinence until marriage.

You just pray that you are around when she decides to go crooked.

The Alpha Girl

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The man-eater. The femme-fatale. The innocent shy girl who got cheated on by her douchebag first boyfriend and as a result, now unleashes a fiery anger and hatred that she now directs towards the male race by objectifying men as toys, giving us superb sexual pleasure, and then leaving us for the flies to deal with our feelings. Hm.

The Life is Beautiful Girl

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Ever meet that girl who just purely loves life? She adores animals, stands up for the weak, cheers for both teams, and always has a good time. She has guys at her feet and she might give a few a look here and there but really she just having a good time right now and would rather focus on that. Boy, what a gal.

The Hot Boss

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Something about a woman having you by the balls literally and figuratively is an irresistible combination.

The Heavenly Beauty Up Close

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You know that ridiculously, hot girl that happens to sit next to you on the bus or asks you for directions? It’s just so mind-blowing to have such beauty interact with you, suddenly getting a much closer look at her and have her ratings go through the roof. Whew. Then she leaves. Sigh.

The Uptight, Controlled Girl

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She ties her hair back so that it looks real “wet” and tight with smart glasses and furrowed brows. She wears a sharp suit to go along with that sharp tongue. Yeah she’s mean and heartless but in a sexy controlled kinda way and you just can’t help but want to melt her and welcome her to the good life.